Workers Song.

I can actually relate to some of the Street Dog's songs now, because I can be deemed working class. I'm not sure how long I will last in my new job, but I made it the first week and I don't think I'll be leaving any time soon. It's so interesting working in that type of environment, because I am a minority being female and it really tests my physical being. I can honestly say I'm not too sore, but I am covered in bruises. It kind of makes me appear as though I'm some sort of heroin addict, which I hope strangers don't think when they initially meet me! Working where I am has taught me a lot about myself and has shown me how capable I am. I respect my dad a lot more for all of the hard work he's done his entire life for his family. I now see how much he had to struggle to make our lives good. I hope that someday I can provide the same thing to my children and hopefully whoever I chose to marry as well.

While throwing boxes today I realized something about myself. I try really hard at virtually everything I do. I was power throwing those boxes and when I felt pain anywhere it just made me push harder. I'm certain I've lost weight, because I've been incapable of eating much due to the schedule I'm living off of and when I do I'm not very hungry. I suppose that's due to physical exhaustion, but hopefully soon I'll get on a more normal eating agenda. Aside from eating and working to my full potential, I also realized that I have been sweating the small stuff way too often. I need to really think about what is good for me and not be afraid of the future so much. I came to the actualization that overthinking and thinking too far into the future actually limits you more than it helps. I always felt as though if I planned everything years in advance I'd be more prepared for the future, but that hasn't proven to be true. In fact, most of my plans seem to deteriorate at some point or another. People are going to walk into your life and walk out. You may not end up at the school you dreamed you would. People you never feared you'd lose might be lost. Life throws us all kinds of curve balls that we will never be able to see coming no matter how prepared we are or how much we practice. That's not a bad thing though, because it makes life exciting. It gives us a reason to live. Being unsure about the future is the most beautiful gift we can be blessed with. Sometimes we get places that are unexpected, but are so rewarding. They come as a pleasant surprise to us. I don't know what this life has in store for me, but I can be certain of one thing everything will be okay.

I know that I have tried my hardest at everything I've done in life. I have tried to treat people well and I have my moments, but for the most part I really do try to make others happy. I feel like life is what we make of it. People always limit themselves and tell themselves they are incapable of so many things that they are so capable of. Sometimes there are things we just aren't that good at. Sometimes we have to give something up because it is too hard for us, but this does not make us failures. It only brings us closer to what we are meant to do in life and to reach our full potential. Tonight really taught me how self sufficient I can be and I love the people that I work with. I'm awfully tired now and plan on going to say goodbye to my friend Janelle (who I love and have known since I was a wee little one!), and get my fingerprints for my job. Until later or some other time. Have a wonderful weekend darlings :]

<3
Alexis Zoe